Uh, duh Mom! Do you see a doggy here?

He wants "wed." My poor, little, sick Monster wants "wed." Only his Mommy (maybe his Daddy) would know that he means Gatorade. He knows that when your tummy hurts, you get Gatorade, but he doesn't remember what it's called, so he asks for "red."

I think I may have to add another language to my resume. Not only do I speak English and ASL, but I also speak monster.

I'm still learning, though. Earlier this week, he told our Pastor that he didn't have a Daddy anymore. I could've sworn that's what he said. Pastor Scott and I laughed and asked him to repeat himself, which he did, in a very condescending tone. Turns out he was commenting on the fact that Pastor Scott left his doggy at home. Of course, he acted like we were idiots because we didn't notice the missing dog.

I figure by the time I learn to speak it fluently, he will have grown out of it. I have to admit, that makes me a little sad.

Check out the fancy attachments on this vacuum!

I wanted to post something witty and poignant, but I am neither witty nor poignant today. Today I am withered and poopy, so you get withered and poopy.

My two year-old monster is driving me insane! He has been the toughest child of the four, and although I have not been spoiling him, he is spoiled. Is it possible to subconsciously spoil?

He does not stop. Ever. I cannot leave him unattended for even a minute's time. And having three other children makes that nearly impossible. I feel the need to lash him to my leg, but I know how the authorities feel about tying children to things and other people. So I don't because I really do love him, and would rather he didn't spend time in foster homes.

He is not distracted by anything. There is no magic toy, t.v. program, or DVD that holds his attention for more than five minutes.

I do not give him copious amounts of sugar. He gets a treat (cookies, a piece of candy, etc) once a day. I've even cut back on the juice severely. He drinks water if he's not getting his soy milk. Where in the world does he get his energy?

He sucks it from me telepathically. That has to be it. It's the only reasonable option that would explain my lack of energy and his over-abundance of it. Great, not only do I have a over-active two year-old, but he's a telepathic energy vacuum, too. How much longer until I can kick him out of the house? Sixteen years? Lord, help me, please.

Jenny taught me how to climb. And I taught her how to dangle.

I've got a yummy, yummy secret to share. Well if I share it, it isn't a secret anymore, is it? Whatever, I have to share this recipe from my friend Jenny, she also sent me that video.

Nutella Pie!
*1 graham cracker crust
*1 box of Devil's food instant pudding
*Nutella
*1 tub of Cool Whip
*1 1/2 c milk
*1 Hershey's chocolate bar (for topping, optional)

-Spread the entire crust (sides and bottom) with Nutella.
-In a med. bowl, mix pudding, 1 1/2 c milk, 1/2 tub of cool whip. Mix well. Pour into crust. Let chill in fridge for 30 min.
-Take out and add remaining (1/2 tub) of cool whip.
-With a cheese grater, put shavings of chocolate bar all over top of cool whip! YUMMO!
-Let chill in fridge for a few hours before eating (or else it will fall apart)!
-Enjoy!

She made one on Sunday and saved me a piece. She had to fight off the hungry menfolk, but she succeeded! Thank you, Jenny!

So yeah, if you haven't tried Nutella yet, it's a chocolate hazelnut spread that is thick like peanut butter. It's good on crepes, pancakes, toast, banana bread, waffles, graham crackers, and scooped out with your finger. Yum, yum, yum...

Oh, you said "tied"! Well, that changes things...

I am only going to use the "P" word once in this post, I promise. And only to say that I will not discuss politics because I'm sure you could use a break. There, that's done.

So... Today I got a little gift in the mail. It made me chuckle; it even made Hubby chuckle. I got a little gift from the hospital where I had my tubes tied. For those of you that don't know what that means, I'm talking about tubal ligation; google it. So why was I laughing about the gift? See for yourself.

Apparently Florida Hospital isn't completely confident in their doctor's abilities.

So what's wrong with her? We still think the temporal lobe.

I've been up since 4 am with the monsters. In their defense, they all have stuffy noses, and the time change is always tough on them (and me). That still did not prevent me from going into Exorcist mode this morning. You know what I'm talking about. Don't pretend you've never gotten so frustrated your head starts spinning around and your eyes glow green.

Anyway, I had a dear, sweet friend (thanks Jenny!) send me this yesterday and I thought I would share with everyone. This morning, I definitely needed a good laugh at how absurd parenthood could be, and this video delivered. Bookmark it for your next Exorcist day, you'll be glad you did.





Oh, and you get extra brownie points if you can guess where I got the title of my post.

Happy, happy, joy, joy!

Congratulations to Nad and Dee!

Nad has won the Chex Mix Basket giveaway, and Dee has won the Pillsbury Savorings Gift Set giveaway.

Please check back because I have more great giveaways planned!